Fears

I think I've just about hit panic mode in regards to grad school. I'm not nervous about being in school, about the classroom/homework/papers/ reading part of school.
Well...not so nervous.
I do have these random, ridiculous fears like: what if I'm not smart enough for this, or what if I don't read critically enough and everyone else is finding these super-deeply profound things in the reading and I'm just enjoying the story and how pretty the words sound together, or what if I've forgotten how to write a paper, or any number of similar what ifs.
When I'm being reasonable it's easy to dismiss those fears.
The fears that are not so easy to dismiss are even more ridiculous, like: where am I going to park, what if I can't find a parking place and have to park illegally and then my car gets towed and I have no way to get back to Austin, what if traffic is worse than usual and I'm really, really late to class, what if I don't have enough money to pay for all the gas I'm going to be using driving to and from San Marcos 2 nights a week, how far am I going to have to walk from my parking space (wherever it is) to my classroom, what if I get lost while walking from that illusive parking space to my classroom, what if I get kidnapped or murdered while walking back to my car after class at 9:30 pm, etc. etc. etc.
Most of my fears have to do with parking. It's bad enough trying to find a parking place at Concordia (I didn't find one this morning...I ended up parking on the street a block north of campus). What's it going to be like finding parking on a campus 5000 times bigger than Concordia??? (Panic mode induces extreme exaggeration in me....)
I have orientation tomorrow night. I'm imagining that the only people who will be there are the panicky, uptight people like myself, and people like that just annoy me. (I know, it's a paradox, isn't it?) BUT...people like that usually ask the same questions I'm wondering but haven't gotten around to asking yet, so I'm hoping to get answers to all my parking fears tomorrow.
And then, class starts Wednesday night. I've already started my reading for the first week because I'm afraid (another fear!) of not being prepared for class. I wasn't sure if "First week's reading" in the course description meant what we need to have read by the first night of class, or what we will be reading during the first week of school and need to have read by the second night of class.
School has a tendency to bring out my over-achiever qualities.